Why is it that complaints about love seem ever-present in women's lives, even for those who are single? Why is "beauty" seen as such an important form of capital? And why do so many women "adopt" their partners, taking care of them, often in their place and on their behalf? What about men: why do they tend to shy away from romance, and why is there ridicule when they do fall in love? Why is work such a focal point for men, while their sexuality often revolves around quantity, as in "how many partners have you had?"
Valeska Zanello addresses these questions of gender hierarchy through the metaphor of the "love shelf." This metaphor brings out the profound qualitative difference in how men and women invest in romantic love. For women, love is often tied to their identity, even to the point of enduring unhealthy relationships. For men, it is seen as an ongoing source of emotional gain.