Ethan is thirty-four years old, a Houston medical device sales rep with Croatian-New Zealand heritage and a system he has spent twelve years perfecting. No third dates. No sleepovers past 4 a.m. No meeting the friends. The system is not cruelty - it is physics. It works. It has always worked.

Then he meets Lena, a Greek-American ER nurse at the Texas Medical Center, and the system stops working entirely.

Gettin' Laid is a literary novel about a man who built an elaborate architecture of self-protection and the woman whose refusal to perform anything - warmth, interest, patience, hurt - makes the architecture visible for the first time. Set against the specific heat and geography of Houston, from the trails at Barker Reservoir to the bars of Montrose to a seven-day Category 4 hurricane that strips everything back to what's actually true, it follows Ethan's first-person voice from full comic performance through disruption and into the stripped silence of a man finally looking at himself without flinching.

At the center of the novel is a question Ethan has been avoiding for twelve years: what is the difference between solitude and loneliness, between control and captivity, between being very good at leaving and being good?

Surrounding him is a cast of characters who know things he doesn't - Santos, his oldest friend, who carries a story from a market in Reynosa that took thirty years to tell. Danny, the cautionary mirror at fifty who is genuinely fine and fine is all there is. Morgan, Lena's person since high school, who delivers the novel's key verdict with the precision of someone who has been watching from the beginning. And Lena herself, who comes through Ethan's incomplete and self-serving narration more fully than he intends.

By turns comic and devastating, Gettin' Laid traces the arc of a man who confused distance with freedom, and what it costs him to find out.